The First Review - McDonald's

After deciding on McDonald's for my first review, I parked and went inside.

I like this particular location because it's kept up with the times. Sadly, it doesn't resemble anything from my childhood, because the times they are a changin'. They've done a great job with the renovations. It was clean and comfortable. The system they have in place for taking the next order, seems quite chaotic and loud. I found the cashier to be quite nice and efficient but a little abrupt when asking me to move aside for the next order.

I decided I would try their flagship product - the Big Mac Combo. I've had this meal countless times, but never to review it. So this was different. I was wondering, would it forever change my experience and relationship with this meal?

I glanced over at the fry station and I noticed a very heavy coating of salt throughout the bin. I asked for my fries without salt. That waterfall salt system has got to go! Nobody needs that much salt in their food!

The drink is bottomless and you fill it yourself at a separate station. The mix was perfect. I prefer Coke.

The tray laid out for me was soaking wet. The cashier quickly put a paper place mat over it. I could see it soaking up the water underneath it. I went to fill my drink and grabbed some napkins to quickly put down on the tray. Otherwise, the fries would have been sopping wet. Not everyone wants to get to know their fries THAT well!

After waiting almost 2 minutes for my Big Mac patiently cooling on the tray, the fries were ready. I went to my seat and prepared for my first review. This would be my first and possibly last Big Mac! Yikes!

I opened the Big Mac box. I looked at it. And I looked at it. I mean really looked at it. With new eyes. It didn't look like the shiny pictures you see in the print ads or on television. It looked like it had a rough night and honestly looked quite lazy and in rough shape. It didn't seem to be anything like what I remembered as the triumphant reward or Little Big Boy's meal when growing up. I was disappointed.

My hero sandwich left me empty. The beef didn't cover the bun, the lettuce looked lacklustre. I was hurt, I was confused, I needed my mommy. I was about to reach for a fry, then I remembered the smack in the head I would get from my mom. Eat the expensive parts of the meal first and don't fill up on the cheap stuff, she would say. Get your nutrition. Maybe it was good my mom wasn't there. It would be hard to explain the tears.

So I picked up the sandwich, it didn't seem all that big to me anymore. Maybe I realized just now, that I'm supposed to be a fully grown man. Or maybe, just maybe, somewhere along the line - McDonald's had lost it's way. Sacrificing size and quality for profits. Forgetting about the experience we had as kids and not being satisfied with being a part of the family. I looked around and I didn't see Ronald or Grimace, the Hamburgler or the Fry Guys anymore.

I took the first bite. I felt like Jaws.

I took a second bite. I felt like Jaws 2.

After that I turned into Jaws 3D. I didn't put it down until it was gone.

I worked on the fries next. I could still taste some residual salt on the fries. It was actually the perfect amount. I peppered my fries. The pepper is apparently just for colour, there was absolutely no flavour to it.

The best part of the meal it seemed was the drink. I enjoyed the mix. I grabbed a refill on my way out.

Our Quest for finding the Most Satisfying Burger! started at McDonald's with the following order:

and sadly, it ends with the following summary,

The Burger Blog is sad to report that the Big Mac is NOT a Satisfying Burger in any sense of the word.

I cannot recommend it for a truly satisfying, exceptional experience.

The burger itself had a lot of air, no substance to it, a strong pickley vinegar taste, due to the combination of the dressing and pickles. The onions had no flavour and only served as a soft semi-crunchy feel. The cheese itself wasn't all that bad. I actually liked the taste of the cheese! The burger literally collapses in your hands. It's basically a double cheeseburger with a center bun, minus one slice of cheese and substitute the thousand island-like dressing for the ketchup and mustard. Oh, and add a few sprinkles of sesame seeds on the top bun. I actually felt ripped off when looking at it like this.

If you are less than 10 years old, have a coupon and want to "cut" your teeth on a burger, this one is probably a good place to start. It's fast and convenient. But as your tastebuds develop and quality takes over, you would be advised to steer clear of this burger.

I probably won't do this very often but when it comes to fast food, I thought I should give a few fast facts about the Big Mac based on a 2000 calorie daily intake:

• 
  
  serving size 209g
• 
  
  calories 540
• 
  
  fat 29g, 45% of the daily value
• 
  
  saturated fat 10g + trans fat 0.5g, 53% of the daily value
• 
  
  cholesterol 70mg
• 
  
  sodium 1020mg, 43% of the daily value
• 
  
  carbohydrates 44g, 15% of the daily value
• 
  
  fibre 3g, 12% of the daily value
• 
  
  sugars 9g
• 
  
  protein 24g
• 
  
  vitamin A 10% of the daily value
• 
  
  vitamin C 4% of the daily value
• 
  
  calcium 25% of the daily value
• 
  
  iron 35% of the daily value

They say you can eat anything in moderation and once in awhile it won't kill you, well this one might! When you combine these numbers with the fries and drink, it becomes even more clear to stay away from this meal.

So what started off with the Man in the Mirror, quickly turned into Dirty Diana and I felt dirty after having eaten the whole meal. It quickly became Another Part of Me and ended with McDonald's being the Smooth Criminal - they stole my childhood! 

It's time to raise my standards...

I think this was my last Big Mac! I've stood back and looked at it with a fresh set of tastebuds. 

The Burger Blog has taken it's first bite...

The Quest continues for finding,

The Most Exceptionally Sastifying Burger!

Lead up to... The First Review

The most common question I've been asked is which establishment will I review first? Truthfully, I hadn't given it much thought, but all of a sudden it hit me. If I review some place most people haven't heard of yet, this blog could be quite off-putting or sound stuck-up! It would be hard to relate to something like that for most people. This blog and it's contents should be accessible and relatable to as many people as possible. Like I've said earlier, I'm not one to try new things often - or even go off the beaten path, as of yet! However, this Quest will surely lead me astray to beat-off in places I would never have considered before! Yes I do like to play with double entendres and innuendoes just to make people smile :) Part of this journey, is to help me grow in directions that I normally wouldn't. Like the great Fat Bastard says "ooohh, get in ma' belly!" Oooh this is getting even more exciting or very scary *gulp*!

So I'm driving along listening to Michael Jackson's Number Ones cd, the song was - Man in the Mirror! The lyrics seemed quite appropo for the moment (appropriate for those that dont like shrtnd words). If you want to make the world a better place, take a look at yourself and make a change. Well, this blog is all about that! Change! I want everyone to be able to enjoy an Exceptionally Satisfying BURGER, anytime, anywhere!

I looked in my rear view mirror and saw the Golden Arches. That's right - McDonald's. I quickly thought about it - should it be my first review?

I quickly went through the Pros and Cons of it. Cons - it could set a low level tone to the blog or give it a stigma. It's too cheap, the quality is low, it's an unhealthy place and I'm sure many of you could add a few more Cons to the list.
The Pros, interestingly enough, were the same reasons as the Cons! It's the challenge of fighting through the stigma. Being fair and impartial I could sink or swim with this first review. Why take the easy road? I mean everyone that I know of, has at some time or other been to McDonald's. My mother would take us to McDonald's as a treat from time to time. At Sports Days at school - we would have McDonald's Orange Drink, remember that? It wasn't orange pop it was orange drink! Growing up we went to several birthday parties held in the caboose at the Boundary & Lougheed location or in the "Play Pen" at Main & 29th Ave. At 16, I had an opportunity of working during Expo '86 at the Westgate McDonald's. I worked in the lobby, I remembered how busy it was - I was changing garbages, and I had my own little route. By the time I was finished my route, the garbages were full again! It was constant, non-stop and super-crowded. I remember one time in particular, my mother showed up with her friend and took my picture in the uniform. God that was so embarassing! Maybe one day, when the psychological scars from that experience have subsided, I'll actually post that picture up! I had a second stint at McDonald's, this time as a Grillman at the Main & 29th location. I learned alot and developed a great work ethic, that was second to none. They taught me efficiency and quality. And, for that I am grateful.

As I sit here typing away, I can't help but think about stigmas. McDonald's is one of those places that has a stigma associated with it. But something doesn't sit right. It's the world's biggest fast food chain restaurant. They serve more burgers than anybody in the world! That doesn't happen by accident.
When I started this blog, I said that I would look at places with a fresh set of eyes and tastebuds!

So here we go...

The Set-up

This is exciting and a bit nerve racking! The first step or rather first bite is one that will forever change my life in my Quest for finding the Most Exceptionally Satisfying Burger!

I'm hoping this will not only satisfy my Quest, but maybe even encourage you to start on one of your own. Perhaps you'll start this journey with me and eventually branch off onto your own. Along the way you'll get an idea of how my mind works. Don't worry, I'm not here to brainwash you, but when I snap my fingers you... oops, my bad! You will find that I am quite opinionated though!

It's been ages since I've actually written or read anything. I haven't really been a person that reads or writes for pleasure. It's always been for information. Succint, brief and to the point. They say writing is good for the soul. Time to set my soul on fire, figuratively well maybe literally for my tastebuds. I do have a habit of digressing onto tangents that have absolutely nothing to do with the original conversation (how's that for a tangent?). I am betting that I'll derive a tremendous amount pleasure from this journey!

I hope my style of expression will paint an epiCurious picture in your head. Yes, I just made up that word! Copyright ME © 2010 - umm ut oh, after just googling that word, apparently it's been used already so Copyleft ME © 2010! (Yes, Copyleft is an actual word - look it up!) Just a quick thought on things like that - there really are no original ideas left on this planet. Originality belongs to the person that get's to it first. Therefore, Originality = Action. How many times have you come up with an invention or innovation, only to see it already out there or soon thereafter? But I digress...

Now back to my Quest - to Find  the Most Exceptionally Satisfying BURGER!